Rough Days Are Worth It

On Saturday after my (not exactly) weekly ride with the guys from the bike shop downtown, we were sitting outside a coffee shop having a cup when Jeff asked how the kids were doing. I told him about Declan getting sick on Friday, a fairly standard cold with a slight fever and some intestinal yuck, and how when he gets sick it primes him for asthma attacks.

“See, that’s why I’m not ready to have kids. That scares the piss out of me, “ said Jeff.

It’s true. Any good parent knows that having kids –- actually having anyone you care about deeply –- can be scary. You put someone in your heart and it can be rough going.

Declan of course quickly shared his illness with Elsie, so she’s had an uncomfortable couple of days.

This weekend, Kaleigh left to go back to school.

Last night, Mom had to go to the hospital.

All painful. But all painful because these people are deep in my heart.

Maybe that’s why some people don’t let others in. Why they disassociate from their family. Why they don’t settle down with one partner. Why they don’t have kids.

Self-preservation, maybe only at a subconscious level.

Not for me, thanks. I'd be nothing without these people.

It’s a sentiment perhaps made trite by overuse, but Elizabeth Barrett Browning had it right when she said it was so much better to take the risk of love.

Amy and I will help Declan through this immediate illness and hopefully his body will grow out of the asthma. Elsie’s gonna be fine -– especially since, thanks to Amy, the wee lass has the perfect food to get and stay healthy. Kaleigh’s a grown woman now and though she goes away, she loves us and will never really be gone. And I just got a great phone call from up north: things are looking positive for Mom –- who’d hate that I’m mentioning her here so I won’t go into details.

So Jeff, my cycling friend, have those kids. It’s scary, but it’s worth it.


And finally, Maureen, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for being there fore Mom and Dad. It’s so difficult being this far away, and I can’t tell you how much comfort comes from knowing you and Patrick are right there.

David